Finding Peace Within Failure

When we are little kids our parents tell us, or at least they should, that no matter what we do in life make sure we give it 110% and try to be the best at it. We shrug it off. We know we should go after what makes us happy. And that reassures us of what we should be doing in life. But we often fail. We often start something, enjoy it, fail, and then there is that emotion tied into it.

The Feeling of Failure

A negative, unsought emotion that makes us feel like “failures”. It’s a sinking feeling, very unpleasant. And if we’ve felt it once, we are likely to feel it again. Because failure is inevitable. It is like hide and seek. You can find the “best” hiding spot, but you will be found. It is a certainty.

It almost feels impossible to find peace and clarity in the current time of failure. But reflecting on our actions that led to failure can help us find answers on how to improve. And at times, failure can bring us peace of mind. The constant pressure of the storm you felt coming has dispersed.

The Storm will Pass

When the storm passes, we tend to either relate an emotion with our state of being or feel peace/clarity. Finding peace in failure is one of the hardest things to do. But it comes with learning that every emotion that we have shall pass. Happy, sad, motivated, angry, etc. It will all pass. Think about it, no one person is stuck with one emotion every day of the year. We will all experience the rollercoaster effect.

I always think of the famous scene of Tom Hanks sitting amongst a group of peers talking about how things “shall pass.” He talks about how feelings “shall pass” no matter what we are currently feeling. Situations shall pass. Moments shall pass. Time does not stop for anyone and is always throwing something new in our direction.

What matters here is how we spend the time that is passing. Are we spending it learning? Are we spending it helping us get where we need to be? Are we spending it with people that will help us grow together?

How we spend time helps us identify exactly who we need to be around. Who understands what we are trying to do and where we are trying to go. In life, we only own moments in time. Our clothes, our cars, our houses will all pass. But what we own are the moments in time.

So if opportunity knocks, let’s give it all we got.

If we give it all we got and we fail, there is no regret or “what if” left behind. Sure, we don't start something knowing we are going to fail. But that's the beauty of the process.

Losing in peace is the beauty in the struggle. We only know so much. Everyone has limitations. Nobody is perfect at what they do. But what we all have the opportunity to do is work as hard as humanly possible to achieve the goal that is currently in front of us. If we go down, go down kicking and screaming. Make some noise. And be at peace with the end result. Because that feeling too shall pass.

“The result may not always be what you hope for, but the sense that you have done the best you can to make things work out, and have given opportunity itself a chance, does produce in yourself that inner peace which is the best kind of security”

-Margaret Culkin Banning